Why being a good person is sometimes wrong

I might be 18 years old , but can’t believe times flies . It gets difficult to realise that you might be not the younger version of yourself , the innocent one with no or less problems . Getting up , go to school , coem home , study and sleep . That was a life ? I mean , apparently yes for a lot of people .

I was never a good social animal ever . I sucked and never had a good relationship with people . Dealing with absolute shit with friends and seldom teaachers in school and the pressure of scoring good was my life . My childhood . My sanity of being a young soul was ever being a people pleaser . I gave the right to people to do whatever in front of me and expecting me to tolerate it , but in a way tolerating me and my love .

I hate to say this , but most of my childhood has this . I remember one such fair incident , when I had to even kneel on my knees to beg 5 minutes for a resolution of the misunderstanding a girl had for me . She never heard of me , and all I did was making myself embarressed in front of people . I define my younger version as a warrior , fighter and a dumb person . So happy to say that .

I am happy to get over it . So happy to say that I grew out of it . Now , maybe I get hurt with everything still , but I never beg and cry . Maybe my emotional maturity or my experience , I have learnt to give respect to people who actually seems to care . I might be a good person of loving people without a filter , but sometimes , be a self centered narrcissist who doesnt care . Dont care for your own sanity . You own happiness . Who doesnt care about your happiness and well being doesnt deserve your good feelings .

It took me while , but I am happy to be where I have reached . Mentally and spiritually , I have grown and always want to grow . That is needed more than those crappy human beings who dont even deserve to have feelings and emotions , they wont ever find peace .